Caring For Aging Parents

There are important matters for you and your parents to consider about their future. If you put it off, you’ll risk the possibility of having to rush through critical decisions, with unfavorable results. Start by asking your parents:

• Where will you live?
• Who will make decisions about your health care and finances if you’re no longer able to take care of yourself?

Ease the pressure on both sides by creating a plan together. For now, maintain an open level of communication with your parents, keep in contact, and let them know you are there for them if and when they need you.

Consider the following issues as you agree on a plan of action:

• Covering Expenses

One of the biggest issues for aging parents and their families is the cost of housing and services.

Nursing home stays are covered by Medicare for a limited period of time only if they are for rehabilitative care immediately after a hospital stay. Medicaid pays only after a person has spent almost all of his or her assets.

Long-term care insurance (LTC) can provide a more comfortable future.

• Every day for a predetermined number of years negotiated when the policy is opened, LTC pays about $100 for nursing home care and about $50 for home services, and sometimes certain costs for assisted living facilities and adult day care.
• The key is to sign up early. Once you buy, your premium stays fixed. But every year you delay purchasing a policy, the rates jump about 8%. For healthy 50-year-olds, a typical policy is $800 a year. At 65, it’s $1,800. At 75, $5,900.
• Be sure to get inflation protection, especially if you open the policy at a younger age.
• Planning for Different Scenarios

The following documents can help ensure your parents’ health care and finances will be taken care of according to their wishes:

Living Will. States what life-sustaining treatment parents want should they become too sick to express preferences.

Power of Attorney. Allows children to act on their parents’ behalf.

• General power of attorney is valid when a parent is mentally competent but not available, such as away on a trip.
• Durable power of attorney names a person and a backup who have the power to make decisions about finances and other matters on behalf of a parent who becomes mentally incapacitated or can’t speak.
• Durable medical power of attorney, or health care proxy, names a person and a backup to make medical decisions for a parent who has become too ill to do so.

Keep copies of all the documents. Provide copies of the living will and health care proxy to your parents’ doctors, lawyer and other family members, and register them at www.uslivingwillregistry.com. Distribute copies of the general power of attorney to businesses and financial institutions with which your parents conduct transactions.

• Where Should Your Parents Live?

The decision is usually based on the level of care they require.

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Senior apartment, retirement community

Apartment building, or complex of buildings or houses for seniors who live independently. Social activities are usually offered and sometimes meals and housekeeping, for an extra cost. (Varies with local market)

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Assisted living facility

Group housing for people with some disabilities. Personal care and supportive services provided 24 hours/day plus some health care and meals.

$2,000-$3,000/month

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Board and care

Small facility for 10 or less. Provides room, meals, help with daily activities and sometimes nursing services.

$350-$3,000/month

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Continuing care retirement community

Large complex offering lifetime care. Options range from independent living to skilled nursing home care.

$60,000-$120,000 one-time entry fee plus about $1,400/month

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Nursing home

Group housing for those who need skilled nursing care and personal care services. Meals provided.

$5,000-$7,000/month